Are You Really Listening, or Just Hearing?
Imagine this: A talented senior analyst raises a concern about a flawed system implementation. Management nods along but dismisses the warning.
Months later, the company spends millions correcting the mistake on something employees had already pointed out. Sound familiar?
This scenario plays out in organizations across industries. Leaders and professionals think they listen, but in reality, they hear words without truly absorbing or responding to them.
The result is miscommunication, disengaged employees, and costly business mistakes.
Listening is not just about hearing words, it is about processing, understanding, and responding in a way that fosters trust, collaboration, and smart decision-making.
It is one of the most undervalued leadership skills in today’s fast-paced, high-stakes work environment.
The good news is that you can train yourself, and your team, to master active listening and transform your leadership effectiveness.
What Poor Listening Is Really Costing Your Leadership
Why Listening Matters More Than You Think
Poor listening has devastating consequences in the workplace. It leads to:
- Lost Productivity. Teams waste time re-explaining things that should have been understood the first time.
- High Employee Turnover. When employees feel unheard, they disengage or leave.
- Expensive Mistakes. Ignoring expert feedback costs businesses millions in corrections.
- Fractured Trust. A leader who does not listen breeds frustration and skepticism among employees.
Think about the last meeting you attended. Did people talk over each other? Did someone dominate the discussion? Were important insights ignored?
If so, you have seen firsthand how poor listening leads to chaos instead of clarity.
Jorge Loebl, founder of Revolving Change, emphasizes how poor listening is an ongoing issue in leadership. He states:
“Listening is, I think, the most undervalued and underrated skill at all in leadership and management. When you look at the education we get, we don’t get it. We spend a lot of time learning to read, learning to write, learning to count, learning to speak. And we never get any teaching on how to listen.”
In a world where leaders are expected to inspire and drive results, listening is not optional, it is non-negotiable.
Where Even the Best Leaders Get Listening Wrong
Despite its importance, most professionals overestimate their listening abilities.
Studies show that while 96 percent of leaders think they are good listeners, only 13 percent of employees agree. This massive perception gap reveals a fundamental problem:
- Most leaders listen to respond, not to understand.
- They filter information through their own biases, missing key insights.
- They equate silence with listening, instead of engaging with what is being said.
So, how do you become the leader who actually listens and gets it right?
How to Master Active Listening Using the 3D Framework
At Revolving Change, we use our Discover, Design, Deliver (3‑D) process to help leaders identify, build, and sustain active listening skills.
Discover: Where Your Listening Falls Short
Start by reflecting on how you currently listen in professional settings.
- Do you multitask in meetings?
- Do you interrupt before someone finishes speaking?
- Do you forget details soon after a conversation?
Jorge Loebl highlights that a major issue is how many people assume they are good listeners when they are not:
“The first problem is recognizing that active listening is an issue. That is where the first obstacle is. The majority of people, when you ask them if they are good listeners, they are going to say, ‘Of course, I’m a good listener.’ But we are often a lot worse than we thought we were.”
Common Listening Pitfalls:
- Filtering feedback based on personal biases
- Mentally preparing your response instead of absorbing information
- Dismissing or invalidating perspectives that challenge your own
- Failing to recognize non-verbal cues of frustration or disengagement
Loebl explains how distractions can also play a major role in ineffective listening:
“The brain takes coffee breaks. We have so much brainpower that whatever conversation we are having is not enough to keep the brain fully occupied. So the brain is doing all kinds of other things. And suddenly, you realize that you have not been actively listening.”
Design: Build Your Leadership Listening Toolkit
Once you recognize your gaps, you can start strengthening your listening skills.
- Use the “Paraphrase and Confirm” Technique.
After someone speaks, summarize what they said:
“If I understand correctly, you are saying we should delay the project by a month to ensure the quality is higher. Did I get that right?” - Manage Your Mental Coffee Breaks.
The human brain wanders every 12 seconds. When you catch yourself drifting, pause, reset, and refocus on the speaker. - Leverage the Power of Silence.
If you want people to listen, slow down, lower your voice, and pause intentionally.
Loebl says, “When I go silent, suddenly everyone turns toward me. Silence forces people to listen.” - Set Listening Rules for Meetings.
Instead of chaotic discussions, implement structured listening checkpoints:- One person speaks at a time.
- No interruptions unless the rules allow for interactive discussions.
- Summarize key takeaways before moving forward.
Loebl also highlights that interruptions are not always bad:
“Interruptions aren’t necessarily bad. There can be helpful interruptions and disruptive interruptions. And that all depends on the rules that you have set for that meeting.”
Deliver: Turn Listening Into a Leadership Habit
The final step is turning these techniques into habits.
- Integrate Listening Into Daily Leadership Practices:
- In meetings, designate a “listening facilitator” to ensure all voices are heard.
- Before making decisions, verify key takeaways with your team.
- Set a “one-second rule” before responding to give space for deeper thought.
- Encourage a Culture of Feedback:
- Make listening measurable. Ask employees to rate how well they feel heard in one-on-one meetings.
- Actively follow up on feedback so employees see real change.
Loebl stresses that ensuring understanding is part of the responsibility of the speaker as well:
“If I understand wrong and I don’t know it is wrong, I will not ask a question. That is why checking for understanding is a critical leadership skill.”
The Listening Challenge: 7 Days to Start Listening Like a Leader
For the next seven days, try these three simple but powerful listening shifts:
- Pause before responding. Give the other person a full second of silence before you reply.
- Paraphrase what someone said before sharing your thoughts.
- In your next meeting, remove distractions. No phone, no multitasking, and fully focus.
Track how these changes affect your conversations and how people react. You might be surprised at how much more effective and respected you become.
The Ultimate Leadership Advantage
Mastering active listening is not just a communication skill, it is a leadership superpower.
It builds trust, sharpens decision-making, and fosters engaged teams.
Continue the Journey
Want strategies tailored to your professional role? Explore how active listening transforms results for your unique leadership path:
For Team Leaders and People Managers: How Team Leaders Can Build Trust Fast With Active Listening
For Entrepreneurs and Business Owners: From Missed Markets to Customer Wins: The Listening Strategy Every Entrepreneur Needs
For Emerging Leaders and High-Potential Employees: From Overlooked to Influential: Master Listening to Accelerate Your Career
Make Listening Your Leadership Superpower
The leaders who listen best are the ones who win trust, drive results, and shape strong cultures. If you’re ready to elevate your influence and communication, this is your next step.